Dealing With Depression

Not a lot of people are talking about it, but many are dealing with it.  Depression is a very real thing that interferes with peoples health, happiness and everyday lives.  I hope by sharing my story and suggestions, I can help someone else.  My photo

I have been dealing with Depression in some sort or another from an early age.  I was the youngest daughter of four girls.  Growing up I felt like I had to compete with my older sisters for my friends.   If I brought someone home, they usually wanted to hang out with one of my older sisters.  I guess she had that crazy spunky personality that attracted people to her.  I guess you can say I was down to earth, boring to some.  I considered myself loyal and friendly but could never hold on to my friends if my sister was around.

Then in middle school the Depression worsened.  I wasn’t the popular girl that everyone looked up to.  I wasn’t the cheerleader or the basketball player, I was just me.  I was quiet in school with a few friends but most of the time, they ended up in other classes than me, so I felt alone.  Then one day, a guy started to talk to me.  He actually liked me.  Another girl, who must have been jealous tried to break us up.  That same girl, who I will not name, followed me all through school.  If I had a boyfriend, she would go after him.  Luckily in high school I found a boyfriend outside of school that I didn’t have to worry about her taking from me.  For some reason having a boyfriend,  gave me some joy.  I wasn’t no longer completely alone.  Now I had someone that I could hang out with and do things with on the weekend.  But at school, I often sat alone.

Now that I have been married, I feel like my greatest accomplishment in life has been my children.  They have brought me such happiness.  When my son moved out, my heart was broken and grieved.  He joined the Air Force without telling me or my husband.  We had only a few months to get used to this idea.  When we went to Nashville to let him give his official oath, I tried to convince him to sign up for 4 not 6 years, but he only got angry with me when I ask him to.

I never felt like my husband had my back regarding talking to my kids; discipling them.  I felt like I had to be the bad guy and he was the friend type of dad.  When my daughter was getting married, I tried every moment I could to spend time with her, because she would be moving to Texas.  The night before her wedding day I felt such dread.  I knew I would no longer have that closeness with her.  We always did everything together; shopping, watching movies, visiting with family, etc…

Now I have the empty nest syndrome.  It has been a couple years already but it still hurts.  People tried to tell me that I would enjoy it when my kids left home, but it simply isn’t true.  My daughter had a baby 3 months ago and we brought her back to the house to spend some time with her and the baby.  What joy we had when that precious boy livened up the room.  Now she has returned home with my grandson and I feel so sad.

I’m trying to find something that I can do that would bring me that happiness again.  I work part-time but when I get home, the sadness returns.  It doesn’t help that my husband works third shift and he sleeps during the day and works at night. So right now I am trying to just express myself through this blog, hoping it will help me overcome this Depression. I know that I have someone that I trust to help me through this and that is my Lord and Savior.  He has helped me so much in the past and I know he will help me now. Also, I am trying to find something to do that will bring me happiness again.  So far I have thought about joining a gym or dieting.  I think it may help me with my overall perspective if I can accomplish something; which is to lose some weight.  I used to be thin but age has caught up with me.  My metabolism has certainly slowed down.

Leave me a comment if this has helped you in any way.  I have written about Depression in the past; things you can do to overcome it.  Please check out this blog post.  Taking Care of Mental Health

Let your Beauty Shine Through

I hope I have inspired you to let your beauty shine from within you by being kind, compassionate and loving to others. In my last post I talked about how beauty comes from within us. Beauty comes from having a good heart, being kinder, more compassionate, and helping to others, etc… Now I want to help you to let your beauty shine.  This can be accomplished by taking care of yourself. As a registered nurse I have learned that that people seldom take care of themselves. People work a lot, have busy lives and they don’t take time to relax. Take a few minutes to unwind from your busy day. Watch some tv, read a book, lounge on the couch and simply relax.

One main reason we are so unhealthy is that we simply don’t eat right. We indulge in things that are bad for us. We don’t take vitamins, we don’t drink enough water. These things are necessary for our overall health. I will talk later about these things in a post about (Eating a healthier diet).

Life consist of baby steps. Each step leads us somewhere. Either in a positive direction or negative.  So follow me and I will help you and encourage you to take steps in the right direction.  I want to inspire you to live a happy, healthier life.  Then, you will have beauty that will shine through and many will see it from afar.

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Interview with Author Harel R. Lawrence

Amazing interview with Author   Tragedy can happen at any time.  This author gives gives us some insight into this and who we can go to for peace and comfort.  Read his interview and book blurb below.

1. How long have you been writing? I have been writing for almost 30 yrs. I was first published in 1993 in a book of poems and my first book was published in 2002
2.What got you started in writing? I was inspired to write when I was in High School English class. I read a book by Mark Twain and Laura Ingalls Wilder.
3. What main genre do you write in and have you written in other genres? I don’t have a specific genre to write in because I have several genre I write in. I written Inspirational, Children’s, Young Adult, Romance, Thriller, and Working on a Mystery book.

4. What publishing route have you used and/or what publishing company have you used? I have used two different publishers, the first publisher I used was a type of vanity press where I had to pay money, the second publisher turned out to be a rip off. The last three books I published were self- published.

5. What inspired you to write this book? Is it the 1st or in a set of books? The recent book I was inspired because of being bullied in school and the school violence. This is my fifth book I self-published.

6. What marketing routes have you used to promote your book? I have used press releases, newspaper ads, social media, paid advertising, and free advertising.

7. Is writing your main career or do you have other jobs? Writing is currently a hobby right now, it is just extra money. I have other jobs

8. How do you start off writing? Do you research, brain storm, or just set the title and go from there? I start off with the title and then start typing. I usually do research on the topic I am writing about. I sometime brain storm for the title, other times I just set the title and start writing.

9. Who inspires you to write and do they help with ideas for the book? I don’t have any person to inspire me to write I just allow any ideas I have and write them down. Sometimes I am inspired by events, or places I been.

10. If you could write one last book what would it be about? It would be a biography about my life as an author.

11. What advice would you give a new author? Do research on the topic you are writing, read a lot of books in the genre you are interested in writing, never pay anyone to publish your book, hire a professional editor, don’t give up on writing. Continue to improve your ability to write.
12. If you had to tell a new author something to watch out for in writing, what would it be? Watch out for vanity publishers that wants you to pay them to get published. Be sure to get references from people who inquires you they are interested in editing, and publishing your book.
13. How do you respond to bad reviews or if you havent ever had one, tell me how you would respond if you got one? Any bad reviews you get , don’t let it discourage you. Use those as a way to improve your writing. I haven’t had any bad reviews most of the reviews I have gotten were very positive reviews.

14. Do you have anyone to read your book and give you advice on it before it is published? I have a few friends that are willing to read it first. I sometimes ask on social media for any advice before I publish my book.

15. Tell us about yourself: Harel Ray Lawrence is an award-winning Young Adult Author, Substitute Teacher, and Missouri Native, driven to create positive change in people’s lives through the power of creative storytelling. To date, his work has been showcased in “Eyes on Magazine” and he has received numerous awards, including Who’s Who in Poetry and Editor’s Choice Award.

In addition to recently publishing “Take a Closer Look: A Spiritual Journey into the Soul” and various others books, he also released a music album. Furthermore, Harel holds an Associate’s degree in Law Enforcement and a B.S. degree in Criminal Justice Administration.

A Friend cover 2

Youth Pastor Brian Hanson knows loss. He’s lived with it since his teen daughter’s suicide. Instead of wallowing in his grief, he’s devoted his life to educating young people about the hazards of bullying.
Johnny is an outcast among his peers. Born into a troubled family, taunted at school, and struggling to find his place in the world, the despondent young man believes there’s no hope for him. His skewed beliefs push him to contemplate the unthinkable, but Pastor Brian isn’t prepared to allow another child to end his life.
Patricia is the epitome of the girl-next-door. Beautiful, full of life, skilled cheerleader, she’s adored by all. Girls want to be just like her. Boys want to be with her. But not every aspect of her life is perfect. Her star quarterback boyfriend lives life on the wild side. One mistake in the dark of night changes her life forever.
Three lives. Each touched by tragedy. Each craving something greater. Can they find peace, happiness, and a new zest for life after so much loss?

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Southern Attraction- Young Adult Romance Book

Southern Attraction Coverart (2)

After tornadoes blast through Alabama in April of 2011; I wrote this book in memory of those that lost their homes or even their lives.  After seeing the tornado destruction and losing power for over a week, and seeing many lives changed that day, I wanted people to remember what happened not only to the state of Alabama but throughout the south.
Southern Attraction is a young adult romance book about a girl who loses her parents and is forced to live with a country-fied redneck uncle from Alabama. There she has to rediscover who she really is.  She goes from the snooty beauty queen cheerleader to part of the southern charm.  She has to choose between two young men that she likes.

Heather has everything she ever wanted; money, clothes, friends, popularity and parents that adored her. Until one terrible day, she loses it all. She is uprooted from a place she loves to a small town in Alabama with a uncle she doesn’t know. The small town of Huckleburg was nothing like Manhattan. Country rednecks owned the town and no one accepted Yankees from New York. Heather didn’t think things could get worse until a tornado comes and blast through the small town. Heather has to lose herself to rediscover what life is all about. She meets two guys that she can’t decide between who she really wants. Join Heather as she discovers that there is more to life than money and fame. Will Heather ever fit in and find true love or will she remain an outsider living in the south.


“Uncle Mick, something is wrong with my television. Can you fix it?” she yelled through the walls to Mick. Within seconds she heard an alarm sounding. “What in the —-”, she said. Her bedroom door came flinging open and Mick ran inside. “Heather, there’s a tornado warning going on. We got to head to the storm pit!” he exclaimed.

“What?” Heather questioned. “I said come on,” Mick said as he grabbed her arm and pulled her behind him. Heather didn’t know what to think. She had never been in a place where tornadoes ever doomed the city, so she just followed Mick’s lead..

As Mick opened the front door, Heather was stunned to see the sky so dark. It had only been a few minutes that she drove into the driveway with a clear sky. Now suddenly a dark cloud hovered overhead. Heather and Mick ran toward the back of the house. Heather started to worry when she saw a cement looking building carved into the ground. Mick grabbed the door handle and pulled it.

“Get inside quick or we are going to be blown away!” he exclaimed. Heather could hear a roaring sound like a strong wind approaching them. She turned to look at the sky when she saw a funnel shaped cloud in the distance. Suddenly, fear came over her and she didn’t know what to say or do. Mick pushed her inside, and he pulled the door closed. Then he latched the door closed. “What are we going to do?” she cried.

“Don’t worry, we are safe in here. I’ve been through several of these storms in the past and everything will be fine,” Mick said, trying to console her. Mick tried to act calm for Heather’s sake but deep down he was terrified. He was worried that the tornado was going to blow the door off the storm pit, and they were going to be sucked out into the twister. He had been fortunate in the past to escape a tornado’s fury, when it ravaged his neighbor’s farm and left his untouched. He wasn’t convinced that this time, he would be as lucky.

Mick’s words of encouragement did nothing to calm Heather’s nerves. She was more scared than she ever had been before. She didn’t know what to expect or what to think about the idea of a tornado approaching. That is something that she never had to experience living in Manhattan.

An extreme fear came over her and she was in shock. Yes, her parents’ passing had traumatized her, but she never felt this type of terror and doom before in her life. She was afraid that this could end her life and Mick’s and she wasn’t ready to leave this world yet. She felt her life was just beginning. She hadn’t lived the life that she always wanted to live. Mick could see the panic in Heather’s eyes and by the expression on her face. Mick heard Heather mumbling something that he couldn’t make out. Then he saw her close her eyes as if she were praying. She cried as she asked God to forgive her and to protect her and Mick from the storm. Heather wasn’t a religious girl but she believed in a higher power. She believed in God as a creator of all things. She knew that now was the best time to make her peace with God, because she didn’t know if she would make it to live another day.

Then suddenly without warning they both heard loud noises coming from outside. Heather heard a crash like something had been hit by a fast moving train. Then she head a hard thud and some clattering and crashing sounds. Her body could feel vibrations through the ground and the walls.

“Lord, I don’t want to die, please help us God,” she cried. Trying to keep his emotions to himself, Mick reached out to hug Heather. She held her uncle tightly hoping that the storm would soon be over.

The vibrations from the ground grew stronger while the deafening booming sounds got louder and louder. Then all of the sudden, there was a complete silence. The storm had only lasted a few minutes, but it felt like an eternity to Heather. After everything became quiet, Heather fell to her knees and began to sob.

“Heather it’s over, don’t worry,” Mick said. Mick was concerned and worried what kind of terror was going on inside of her head. He could see her distress, but he didn’t know what to do, except hold her until she stopped crying. He was hoping that he could regain his own composure in the process.

“Everything will be alright, I promise,” he consoled.

After sitting on the concrete floor for several minutes, Heather finally quit shaking. After seeing Heather come back to herself, Mick leaped up off the concrete floor and went to open the door to the outside. The sky began to lighten and he walked outside to look around. Heather slowly got up on her feet and crept outside. She was taken back at the sight she saw before her eyes. A pile of rubble sat where the house once stood. All she could see was a dirty field full of debris. Their furniture and possessions looked like garbage, scattered acrosss the ground.“Are you okay,” Mick asked.“Yes, I’ll be fine,” Heather replied. After climbing over a pile of of wood Mick said, “Look, your car is over there and there is my truck. Maybe they are driveable.”  “I guess things could be worse. At least we weren’t injured,” Mick said as he surveyed the area. “How can you say that? You lost everything in that terrible storm. Don’t you care that we are both now homeless?” Heather asked with frustration. “I know you are upset, but we’ll figure something out.”Heather couldn’t understand why Mick was so calm and unemotional. He has lost his mind or something, she thought.

Mick walked over to his truck and tried to crank it. The truck started up without a hitch. “Come on Heather, let’s go see if someone might need our help.” Heather was still a little shaken up and confused when she followed Mick to his truck and climbed inside. Mick started to drive down the gravel road leading away from his farm when they observed a horrendous sight. They both were astounded at what they saw before their eyes. They looked around as Mick drove and they saw piles of debris scattered along the road and fields. They noticed the path of destruction was over several miles and only a few homes were left untouched.

“It is weird but it looks like the tornado picked its targets,” Heather said. “I see what you mean. Some houses are left and others are completely gone. It even cleared out all the trees,”Mick replied. Mick pulled over to the side of the road by a mound of rubble. He jumped out of the truck and ran over to where a house once stood. “Is there anyone in there?” he yelled.

Please help us!” Noises came from underneath the wood fragments. Mick ran to the debris and started pulling off planks of wood and garbage. “Come help me!” Mick exclaimed as he motioned for Heather. Heather quickly hurried to help Mick pull off the jagged and sharp boards from the heap of rubble. “Be careful, these have nails in them,” Mick instructed.Finally, Mick could see an older couple peering out from underneath the wreckage. He dug faster but carefully trying not to injure them. At last, an elderly man and woman climbed out from underneath. “Thank you! Thank God, you came. We don’t know how long we would have been under there,” the man said. Heather could see how glad the man and woman were that they were rescued. Suddenly Heather felt good that she was able to help the couple. After checking for injuries, Mick told the couple that they were going to look for other people who needed help. They waved goodbye as they quickly drove down the rode. So many people were out examining the area looking for survivors and anyone that was trapped.

Heather saw steel power lines snapped in two. Cars and trucks were turned upside down on their axles. Huge trees were uprooted and pulled up from the ground with the roots lying on top of the ground. Cement slabs were robbed of the houses that once stood on their surfaces. Shreds of cloth that once resembled clothing lay on the ground. Pieces of twisted tin were wrapped around trees that still stood amongst the wreckage.

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Why Write?

Writing is an outward expression of one’s inner thoughts, feelings and emotions. Writers enjoy expressing their thoughts through writing, but at the same time, it is pleasing to the mind. Writing bring enjoyment to the soul by relaxing the senses. It can brighten your day by helping you to forget the stress that once felt too powerful to overcome. It can help you overcome a loss or rejoice in a new occupation. Writing in any form is way to reflect your life’s experiences on paper.

Two Wugz

Awhile back in my Fiction Writing class the question came up of why different people write. I think this is a great question and one that should be explored in depth by all writers. There isn’t a wrong or a right answer to it of course, but I certainly think it is helpful to consider. Personally I came to a sort of multi-layered conclusion. I started writing because it was fun, because it was something I wanted to do. I continued writing because sometimes there were stories I wanted to read and they didn’t exist, so I felt it was my duty to tell them. Nowadays I’m more concerned with the all consuming idea that I want to say something. I mean really say something. I don’t want to write something that is just entertaining to others, I want it to have meaning and depth to it as well. It…

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What’s In A Day

What’s in a day is the ultimate question. What would you do if you only had one day to live? If God told you that you only had one day left on this earth, would you make changes to the things you are already doing? One day can make all the difference in the world. One day you can break someone’s heart, mend old friendships, renew your faith, give us the chance to witness, live life to the fullest or to do unspeakable acts.

What’s in a day? Life is fragile but there is so much we can do in our lives. We affect someone in every aspect of our lives without even realizing it. I look back on times when I was younger and at the present time. I see things I could have done differently.

You might ask why I am writing this type of thing on this blog. The reason is: I had a dream that God was asking me how I wanted to die. As I searched through the best way to die, I reflected on how it would affect others. If I died in my sleep, I wouldn’t be able to say my goodbyes because it would happen rapidly. If I died from other ways like having cancer, I would at least have the chance of saying goodbye even though I might suffer.

The thing is no one knows the day or the hour when they are going to die. Not even the ones who die with cancer. We might have that opportunity to make our final arrangements and say our goodbyes but we might have more times to do things that we shouldn’t. When we live here on this earth, we might not have any intention on hurting others but many have. You might say I’ve never cursed anyone, never hit anyone, never murdered, never stole from anyone. I want to say that even through all of this, you have hurt someone in one way or another. No one lived a perfect life except Jesus.

If we neglect to help others, we have hurt them. If we have neglected to give someone money or food when they needed it, we have hurt them. So my question for you is what would you do if you only had one day left?

A Little Inspiration for the Uninspired

A little inspiration for the uninspired.

Fulfilling your Purpose in Life.

Do you know what your life’s purpose is?  Are you fulfilling your destiny?  This is something that everyone should ask themselves.  Every person on this earth has a destiny or purpose for their life.  The Answer is “How to find out what that is.”  There are steps a person can go through in their life that brings them closer to the realization of what they are destined to do.  Some people discover that truth early in life, some later on.  Some know what they were created for but choose not to obey.  Some know but don’t complete their life’s purpose because of fear.  It could be fear of failure, fear of letting others down, fear of having too much responsibility.  Yes, it is easy to say No and I give up.  Stress can affect everyone’s life and make it difficult to accomplish their end goal.  Some come near to the end of their life and reflect back on what if’s.  What if they had did something different.  What if they hadn’t let someone down.  What if they had gotten married to their childhood sweetheart.  What if they had became a missionary.  Think of it like this.  What will you ask yourself when you are on your deathbed?  Will you say to yourself that you accomplished everything that you wanted to.  Would you be happy and content with your life?  Or would there be regrets?  I don’t think anyone wants that.  So now is the time to do what you are purposed for.  Quit letting fear get in your way.  Determine in your mind that you are going to get that promotion.  That you are going to live a life that you are pleased with.  That you are not going to have regrets. So examine your life closely to find out what your purpose is. What are you good at and what is something that everyone else ask you about. Are you a teacher? Are you a preacher? Are you someone that helps others? Look at your knowledge base. Take notes. Ask questions. You will discover the truth. 

Good luck on your life’s journey and I hope you accomplish everything that you want in life.

Determination is The Key

Why do so many people have trouble getting what they want in life?  Is it lack of will power, no energy to complete the job, lack of self-esteem.  I say all can contribute in some way, to affecting us and preventing us from achieving our goals.  One must ask themselves, what is important to you?  What do you really want to accomplish?  Do you want to just get by in life and pay your bills?  Do you want to be happy?  Do you want to be famous?  Do you want to accomplish a goal?  All of these questions are what you need to look at before you determine what you really want.  Then, you can move forward into achieving your goals.  No I am not an inspirational life coach, but I do read things they have to say.  You have to tell yourself to stay focused on what you want because with determination and a set goal, you can achieve what you really want.  Yes, money does factor into a lot of things.  Money has always come between people and their dreams of happiness, but has it?  Only if we allow it too.  Today if you have a computer, a little no how, you can market yourself without a great deal of money.  There are so many places that offer free services to the public.  With determination you can find those places and market yourself.  Good luck with your dreams and I hope you accomplish everything you want in life.


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The use of some of these photo and content are protected under the fair use act under the copyright law. Section 107 contains a list of the various purposes for which the reproduction of a particular work may be considered fair, such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Section 107 also sets out four factors to be considered in determining whether or not a particular use is fair. 1.The purpose and character of the use, including whether such use is of commercial nature or is for nonprofit educational purposes 2. The nature of the copyrighted work 3. The amount and substantiality of the portion used in relation to the copyrighted work as a whole 4. The effect of the use upon the potential market for, or value of, the copyrighted work


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